Some time ago, I helped Nouria who had been afraid to sleep with her sister since the death of her adult nephew. He had crashed with his car. When he was alive she was often there, but since her cousin's death at the age of 30 she no longer dared to sleep there. She felt guilty to her sister about this, but she had the feeling of a negative entity in the house and found it terrifying.
Hypnotherapy helps against all kinds of fears. Including the fear of ghosts or negative entities[1]. Reason enough to help Nouria with this.
Figuring out the problem
She also had fears that dead people can resurrect as a kind of ghost, so not a zombie. There is no body, but it is more the energy and that feels very heavy. The feeling is in front of her and coming at her.
I asked her to draw a picture of it and describe what that looks like.
This was something big coming at her that made her feel very small. It would be a translucent gray, like a fog.
She also didn't dare go through there to get to the other side where there would probably be nothing. Because then she was afraid she would be caught unseen in that fog. Grabbed by the throat.
Very understandable to be afraid of that.
I asked her if the fog has hands?
Nouria: "Yes, because it really grabs her by the throat."
So thick gray transparent with hands. And according to Nouria, it also had fangs, like Dracula. She used to think that was terrifying, too. However, it did have the eyes of Casper the little ghost. A cartoon from the old days.
I thought that was kind. I went on to suggest, "So he looks friendly while grabbing you by the throat. Isn't that one friendly?
Some people don't look it on the outside, but they are very sweet people. That you find them scary at first, but when you engage in conversation, they're actually a nice person."
Had she ever experienced that? That it wasn't so bad compared to first impressions.
"A fog like that can't help having those hands either. Have you ever asked, what do you really want?
Close your eyes and imagine that big fat textured fog coming at you and it grabs you by the throat, but it also has those friendly eyes of Casper. That's pretty special. Ask "what do you really want?" Then what comes to mind? What happens next?"
Nouria: "He softens something."
Edwin: "Maybe he just wants attention then. Ask again what he wants."
Nouria: "He wants to be seen."
Edwin: "Just say 'I see you,' what happens next?"
Nouria: "A lot of sadness comes here." (gesturing to her heart)
Edwin: "Yeah, let it go. He just wants to be seen. Are you in phantom land, you just want to be seen, find all kinds of ways. It's like Beauty and the Beast. You're Beauty then. It seems completely terrible. He's all hidden in phantom land and then there's somebody he can make contact with and then he crawls away too.
And then that one thinks "you see," but not now. Now you have looked at him and then you indeed feel a lot of sadness. In you, but maybe also in the other person."
I asked her how it felt now that she had seen and felt him? It did feel less scary now. When she was with her feeling it was less, but then it would pop back into her head and then it would start thinking again.
I went on to suggest, "Close your eyes one more time and that big, gray, fat structure will come again, with hands, teeth..."
I was interrupted that the eyes had now turned into "laser things," they were no longer friendly.
Edwin: "Okay, but what does it say?"
Nouria: "I'm coming to get you."
Edwin: "Okay, I'm coming to get you. Well, then where do we go? What does that one say?"
Nouria: "He doesn't want me to live or anything, that idea."
Edwin: "Why not?"
Nourië: "No idea. It's all black there."
Edwin: "Okay, that's his job then. Bit of scaring."
Asking for help to solve the problem
Then suddenly, according to Nouria, there were two. One with kind eyes and one with mean laser eyes. I indicated to her that they ask that friendly on for help. For example:
"Would you like to help me? Would you like to help me, because you're kind of big you know um... big fat structure with teeth and stuff... And um, would you like to help me against that prickly guy?"
According to Nouria, this had an immediate effect, as the friendly crept before the mean and then the prickly was gone.
Of course, that was totally awesome and then I asked her how it felt now.
Nouria: "My head is hell all like 'What am I doing? This is going nowhere. I need to quiet that one down."
Edwin: "That's right, it's not about anything either, but that's not a bad thing at all. Look for your brain it doesn't matter if it's real or fantasy. None of that matters. It's just a story that was holding you back and you make a new story that works for you. See and nobody necessarily needs to know that. What do you care, yes well there is some thick fog in front of you that protects YOU, top! Imagine: you go to your sister's and you get in there... Now what happens?"
She indicated that there wasn't much going on during the day, but there was at night. So I asked her to imagine herself sleeping there. What happened next?
Nourië: "Yes, so I don't dare sleep alone, then she has to lie with me and if I have to go to the bathroom, the bathroom is downstairs, then she has to go with me too."
I asked her what happened now when she remembered that she did lie there alone. Then the friendly ghost went with her.
I asked how that felt. It felt peaceful.
The suggestion of guardians
So somewhere Nouria wanted her to be protected. Here I was able to make a nice suggestion.
"You know, we all have some kind of guardians, you might say. I call it angels for a moment, but you can actually call it anything, doesn't matter. I'm delving into that right now. Funny, isn't it?
So then you have those on the shadow side, I call them the brothers of the shadow for convenience. They have their own job of keeping people away from what they are really here to do, in all kinds of ways. And then you have the white brotherhood or other spirits who also have a job to do. The interesting thing is that the brothers of the shadow just do their thing and keep people off, while the white brothers wait for you to ask for help and do nothing else.
So if you constantly keep asking for help, say in the form of Casper the ghost (doesn't matter what form it takes), that's part of the bright side. It's not even about what form they appear in, whether it's fog or something else. The idea is simply, "Okay, I want to be helped" and boom! The shadow brothers move on to someone else because they don't care. With 8 billion people, there are plenty of others who don't ask for help and so they have plenty of work.
Now imagine lying there alone in bed with your sister.... What happens when you think about that?"
There was still fear, but she had to feel that Casper.
Making something serious funny
I asked her what she was afraid of regarding anxiety. Surely she was afraid that the bad ghost would come and get her and strangle her. I then asked her what had happened to the person who died. That one had crashed into a tree with the car and the next of kin have no idea if he was conscious or unconscious at the time.
So I indicated suppose it was conscious, people make their own decisions. It sounds a little harsh to some people what I'm about to say, but if it shouldn't have happened it wouldn't have happened. There are plenty of people that it just doesn't work out because apparently it wasn't supposed to happen.
And also when it comes to fear of something in the future. Some people are afraid that a certain thing is going to happen and then wait 50 years for that and then when it happens they can say "you see." But then again, 50 years before that nothing happened, so then they might as well not have been afraid.
So why be afraid? If it comes then it comes and if it doesn't, it doesn't come.
Sometimes something is inevitable, but it even happens that people heal from cancer that could not be cured and other people die again from the same cancer, making you think, Hey? But how can that other person be cured?", yes apparently just wasn't allowed to happen.
And as human beings, we like to be in control. I also do everything I can to live as long as possible, but I also know that even though I live healthy and am very well better, if I get under a bus then it stops. And then I have lived very healthy.
While all this was going on Nourië shot into laughter. This is important, because when people can laugh it's no longer a problem. I reinforced this by continuing for a while.
"Yes, yes, I must admit that it sounds rather crude, but yes, then it says on my tombstone, "He died despite his healthy lifestyle." Yes, it's very unpleasant, but that's the way it is. But you know what? I just want to enjoy life now. That's why I do some healthier things these days than I used to. Not because I want to stretch my life at all costs, but because it's nice to feel good. If I get the chance to live longer, then gladly, of course. But yes, I also realize that tomorrow could suddenly be over. So at least today I lived nicely.".
Dark entities and depressive symptoms
Then she expressed that she is also in a twilight zone with her own life. Before that, she would always use depression, which she then did. Then she's not dead, but she's not alive either. Then she stays in that twilight zone.
I recognized that, that you just imagine the worst, because then you've already figured it out. I mentioned all kinds of examples like that. That you disappoint yourself, so that other people cannot disappoint you. Then you decline an invitation, for example, so that the party cannot be disappointing.
Or that you're already going to hurt someone so you can't be hurt. Then you are just not a nice person to other people, but you do it purely out of pain, purely out of self-protection, a kind of false security. Until you find out that you have nothing to lose.
Because if you have nothing to lose, you might as well express your feelings and say what I think. No matter how crazy it is. And exactly the people who don't think it's crazy, you then deal with that over time.
That can take a long time, though. And at some point you find that that fog, the haze of depression, dissipates, because then you think "Yeah, you know, I'm not going to put myself in twilight territory anymore. I'm just putting myself in the light now. Not in darkness either. I just put a construction light on it or a sunlight, maybe more pleasant, but I put myself in the light.
People are often afraid of their own light, because yes, such aray of light. "Oh, what will the others think?" There are all these voices coming up, but you can categorize those voices from the brothers of the shadow, because they don't want you to step into that light either. Imagine this: you're all going to inspire people. Making people happy, maybe you're even going to help people move from the shadow realm into the light.
They don't like that. So do they with me. They try to antagonize me from all sides, but I ask for help."
The idea that God is not your friend
As I was telling this, Nouria asked who I was asking for help from then, because she didn't find it all tangible yet. She couldn't grasp it.
You can ask anyone. At first I indicated she could ask God, but she couldn't do anything else with that because she had had an argument with God. Then I first had to change the idea of a judgmental God to a God who is more like a father or mother to you. Who despite everything does love you and that he created the world so you can learn something from it.
I gave this suggestion at one point:
"Imagine: God created this. Imagine: who created all this with us in it, I know it all. Surely that (God) knows the misery that created it all? Then he knows that we are going to curse him, don't you think? He understands that, doesn't he? He created all that too, didn't he? So that is fine with him, isn't it? He just knows, "Okay, but you are the better for it. You have to find out that you are still in paradise, but you are making hell in your head. You need to find that out. Well, and I give you all kinds of situations to find out. Well and those situations are generally k*t, let's face it, because otherwise you won't find out. Otherwise you don't learn anything. If it's all fun you don't learn anything. Well, and that's the same with this.", but good. If you think like that to get out of that twilight zone What happens now?"
Now, above all, she experienced a lot of hope. There was a much greater sense that she was not alone.
That's right, because you always have a higher power with you. God, Allah, the source, just name it. I went on to suggest.
"He's just hoping, or she huh, so that at some point you start to see in of "Oh wait a minute ... I'm just doing this all by myself in my head." You know. "I don't have to listen to this. I don't have to listen to the brothers of the shadow," so to speak. "I don't have to do anything with that. I don't have to do anything with it. I don't have to identify with them. Maybe they are not even mine," so to speak, "and even if they are mine, yes my brain that just generates that. I don't have to do anything with that. All I have to focus on is, Yes, the help that is there and I just let life go as it is and I have an idea with that. I'm interested and I follow joy, what makes me happy, I'm going to do more of that and I don't know where it's going to come out, but I do know that if I do that more, I'm going to be happier." Yes, and then they say, "Yes why do you do it?", "Yes because it makes me happy actually.", "Oh yes and that's it. but what about this, this, this, this, this, this.", Yes, have no idea and sometimes you have to do things that might make you a little less happy, that's possible and I don't get very happy about tax returns, but yes... Should too yes, because I get even less happy about fines. So yeah, then again it's a choice huh."
I asked Nouria how she felt about it now.
The task of dark entities in your life
She indicated that now she mostly chose to play mother and have to do all sorts of things, then not do them, and then get resentful about that.
In fact, what she wanted to do was emotionally focused bodywork for migrant women. She wanted to set that up, but it was mostly playing out in her head.
Then I indicated that it is often about taking small steps. She probably already knew women in her target audience, but had she already started with one?
That was not the case, she dared not. She was also now mostly thinking about websites and things like that what she would need to get started.
While people she tells it to all respond enthusiastically.
Then I started telling them that my business wasn't as successful from Day 1 as it is now either and that you just have to start.
Then at one point she indicated that she did go through those first steps a few times, of starting with one person, but then quitting when the point comes. Once it starts to get real then she caps it.
Nouria: "For example, I've had talks also in community centers, but also elsewhere and they would say 'Well come on we have a group even for you this and that' and then I do organize it so it can't go on."
I indicated that that shadow side then still says "don't do, don't do, don't do. You have to go all the way to the back of that dark place." that they don't want you to help people. Imagine bringing people into enlightenment, that's not the intention. I also indicated that that negativity is then the job of the shadow. Their job is to keep everyone in the shadows.
"Look: I went through that too. You're really opposed on all sides huh, seemingly huh, because basically you don't have to listen to it ... But yes, in the beginning you do worry that it won't work out. Sleepless nights, sweating, this, you know. Well and at some point you're standing in that community center and then it happens and you think "Yeah, there's nothing wrong" and then you're busy and then later you think "Okay, well and then the next step comes. Oh we're going to a make the group bigger." Bam you get pulled back again "ho, ho, ho, ho five people is fine yes, now you want fifteen people." Again you get that whirlpool, that whirlpool. Then at some point you think "Oh this (emotion/thought) I recognize. Hey, thanks boys. Thank you, but I'll just go that way." Find them very annoying, but also fine."
Controlling the dark entity
That negativity is just the job of obscurity. Just as the tiger just bites, negativity is the job of negative entities. But if you don't go along with it, then you can get other feelings. That negativity is just the task of negative entities. The task is not even personal. It's just what it is.
So, I explained, you want to put yourself in the light and resist that negativity. You can do that by asking for help, for example from God or Allah. This is because then the grip of those negative entities is gone.
Then she interrupted me that she noticed she really needed a word or image for that, but not Allah or God or something.
I asked Angel then? Then she gave to her mother.
I took that into the next suggestion:
"Also totally fine. Yeah, well you say "Mommy! Then help me be fine too." The word is fine. Look the word is fine, as long as you feel "Okay, I'm being helped by my mother and by all the generations before that still." That whole women's line that's nice too, isn't it? Mom, grandma, great-grandma. Come on, come on, hup. Okay, that you think "Okay, little woman power and hupsakee in yes."."
Then that shadow side lets you go, too. Then suddenly it's "Okay fine, then go do it anyway, y'all."
She indicated that she noticed that she did make that shadow side very big, while also keeping that other light side small.
Here I was able to move forward with the following suggestion:
"Yes, exactly, but so do it the other way around. So close your eyes and make that one side very small. Kind of like a little weak point... What you slide all the way to the horizon and that other side. For example, the woman's line or your mother or I don't know, you make it very big, you put it all full in the sunlight, all full in the light, that's that one side so that it's also spread all over that other side that actually that other side is also all in the light. You do see a little black dot very far there somewhere, but that's almost irrelevant. What happens next?"
She felt like her chest opened up and she could now see far.
Edwin: "Yes, exactly, and if you now think with this feeling of going to sleep eh at night alone with your sister What happens next?"
The Change
Now she felt calm. To reinforce this feeling and the brain connections, I repeated the question again to see if it really felt calm.
I then gave her the suggestion:
"Yes, do bring that dot forward more and more now. From the shadow side so to speak... You bring that forward again. But so do you notice that yourself then?"
Nouria: "Yes"
To this I continued that she noticed that she herself was bringing out that darkness. I also gave her the suggestion of moving that darkness so that she would have an even greater sense of control over it. This she indeed liked, at the same time she wondered why she was taking that darkness so seriously.
To me, that was the signal that the suggestions had already done their job.
Edwin: "But that's good. That's the beginning of "Why am I actually taking this so seriously?" because then you're actually already there. Then you're no longer identified with it. You know what I mean? Then you are really a light year away from it. It may not seem so, but if you have reflection on your own thoughts. So saying "Why am I taking this seriously?", really then it already becomes different, because you get a different feeling about it and especially if you say it in a different tone like "Why am I taking this so seriously really?" Such a tone... Okay well let me take the other side a little more seriously. Just the side that thinks I should go and help those women from that migration background. Yeah, maybe I should start taking that one a little more seriously."
I asked her what happened now when she thought about it. Her body felt calm and open, even when she thought about the heavy energy. That could go through her, that was okay, nothing wrong.
So the problem was solved 😊.
Watch the entire session here:
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