Letting Go of the Therapist: Why 15+ Therapy Sessions Don’t Prove Quality, but Rather Dependency

Let’s get right to the point. Three sessions. And then you’re done. It’s usually that simple.

Not always, of course, because we have to remain realistic. But when a course of therapy really takes fifteen, twenty, or even more sessions… Well, then you’re simply stuck with a method that doesn’t work. It’s that simple.

Then you’ll find yourself sitting in someone’s chair every week, who—often unconsciously— makes you completely dependent on therapy.

Don’t get me wrong: those therapists usually don’t do this on purpose. They’ve simply been trained that way. During their training, they dutifully learned that change takes time—that it needs to “sink in.”

That you have to dig deep into the past and that it all has to be very difficult and complex. These are all excuses to explain why the process is so incredibly slow.

But if we’re being completely honest? It’s nonsense. Complete nonsense.

Watch the video:

How quickly do you develop a phobia?

I actually always have just one very simple example to illustrate this. Imagine this: how quickly do you think a phobia—a truly intense fear response—is instilled in someone?

How many sessions does the brain need for that?

The answer is: none. It happens within 10, 20, maybe 50 seconds. Bam. One moment of shock, one intense experience—often at a young age—and the brain programs a lifelong, automatic fear response in a fraction of a second.

If our brain is capable of instilling a phobia in less than a minute, why on earth would it take twenty sessions to get rid of it?

That’s not necessary at all. If the programming can be implanted in one fell swoop, then the deprogramming can also be removed in one fell swoop. One session, and you’re done.

I can already hear you thinking: “Yes, but Edwin, what about deeper-seated, generalized fears? People who’ve been afraid of everything for years?”

Of course, if fears are more complex and are actually a symptom of a deeper, underlying problem, then a single one-hour session might be too short. But twenty sessions? That really makes no sense at all.

If, after twenty sessions, you’re still sitting there talking about your problems every week, you should just pack up and leave. That’s not a sign of therapeutic quality, but of dependency.

30 minutes online (and a lifelong problem is almost gone)

We recently had another session in our Summer School. Maybe you’ve seen the video—and if not, you really should check it out. I worked with a woman online during that session. The entire process took about thirty minutes.

And what was remarkable was this: due to a glitch in the camera setup, she couldn’t even see me. She was simply sitting there with her eyes closed, listening to my voice. I didn’t know her; I knew nothing about her background.

And yet, within half an hour, there was a tremendous result. Was her lifelong problem completely resolved after those thirty minutes? No, not entirely. But was it eighty or ninety percent resolved? Absolutely.

If we give that lady just one or two more sessions to dot the i’s and cross the t’s, then she’ll be all set. That is the unparalleled power of good hypnotherapy.

Danish research on children up to age 17 also shows that fears—such as those of animals or heights— can be reduced in a single session, even without hypnosis[1]. A meta-analysis examining the use of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to resolve a phobia in a single session found that this approach is effective for both young people and older adults[2]. Furthermore, hypnosis enhances the effects of CBT.

The best part is that at the HIN, we use a technique similar to the one from Denmark, but while the person is under hypnosis. And in my experience, this technique is effective in reducing anxiety across all age groups.

Why EMDR Often Takes Unnecessarily Long

Now, I’m not going to claim that hypnotherapy is the only method that works. Absolutely not. Fortunately, there are many excellent methods that yield fantastic results. Take EMDR, for example. I’m genuinely a big fan of it. It’s a wonderful, effective technique for trauma processing.

But when I hear therapists say they need eight EMDR sessions for a single specific trauma… Well, that really makes me scratch my head. I simply don’t know what you’re doing, but in any case, it’s not working for that client.

• The Reality of EMDR: Normally, it takes one, two, or at most three sessions, and then you’re done.
• The reaction from the establishment: “Yes, but Edwin, then you simply don’t understand how EMDR really works.”
• My answer: No, then you, as a therapist, don’t understand how to use the technique.

What’s often lacking, in fact, is how the technique is “sold” to the client. If you, as a practitioner, introduce the technique properly, guide the client perfectly, and ensure that he or she can fully stay connected to the feeling and the imagery—bam—you’ll achieve impressive results in just one session.

What if it doesn’t work right away in the first session? Okay, that can happen. Then you’ll need to “sell” the technique better the second time around. But if, after eight attempts, you’re still waving or tapping and the client still doesn’t notice any significant difference? Then the therapist hasn’t laid the foundation properly. The method itself is, in fact, extremely effective.

The Fallacy of “Overhyped” Hypnotherapy

Unfortunately, we see exactly the same phenomenon with hypnotherapy. There are therapists who claim to use hypnosis but who completely undermine the whole process from the very beginning.

Many therapists use endless, sleep-inducing inductions. They tell the client that it’s actually “just like watching a movie” or that “all hypnosis is, in fact, self-hypnosis.” In doing so, they immediately strip away all the magic, all the power, and all the healthy anticipation the client might have.

That client lies there and, after an hour, thinks: “Well, I might as well have been lying on a regular psychologist’s couch.”

At the Hypnosis Institute of the Netherlands, we do things very differently. We believe in:

1. Rapid inductions: Techniques that penetrate the subconscious immediately. No time wasted. Depending on the person you’re working with, this can happen in a matter of seconds[3].
2. Direct interventions: Going straight to the core of the problem, where the emotion lies.
3. Intensive testing: Immediately confront the client with the old trigger during the session to see if it’s truly gone.

The Power of Testing (The Cherry on Top)

Recently, after watching a demonstration, a therapist said to me, “Edwin, now that I see you in action, I realize I really don’t test my clients nearly enough.”

And that hits the nail on the head. Most therapists test far too little. They perform an intervention, the client opens their eyes, and the therapist gently asks, “So, how does it feel?” The client politely replies, “Yes, pretty calm.” And just like that, the session is over. But you haven’t proven anything at all!

You have to confront that fear. You have to activate that trigger. Only when you let the client experience that, even with the best will in the world, they can no longer bring up that old fear or stress—only then does the conviction take hold. Testing isn’t just the icing on the cake. It’s the entire garnish—and the flavor—of the cake. That’s what wins the competition. That’s how you ensure maximum results in as few sessions as possible.

The “customer for life” trap

If we’re being very cynical, you might ask: what is actually the purpose of a therapist who conducts fifty or sixty sessions in their practice?

Some therapists also consistently refer to their clients as “patients.” As if those people were physically broken, as if they were chronically ill . What kind of message are you sending someone when you treat them weekly as if they were a sick patient?

If you’re looking for a lifelong client who dutifully pays their own share every week (with insurance covering the rest), then by all means, keep doing what you’re doing. With twenty or thirty clients, you’ll have a fantastic, stable income for the rest of your life. After all, they’ll keep coming back for years to come.

But if you, as a therapist, really want to make a difference, take off those blinders. Look around and see what else is possible. After all, it can be done so much faster.

I’m confident enough to make this claim: send me that client you’ve been treating for fifty sessions already. I’m almost certain that in a single session, I can achieve more substantial change and results than were achieved in all those dozens of previous sessions combined. That’s not arrogance; I’ve simply seen it happen hundreds of times.

The biggest problem for people who have been in therapy for years is, in fact, no longer even their original complaint. Their biggest problem is that they have come to believe they are patients. The longer the therapy lasts, the bigger that problem becomes.

My advice to you

Have you been in therapy for months or even years now? Have you already had more than twenty sessions and are you barely noticing any progress, or at most just a tiny bit of relief after talking?

Please stop doing that.

Look around you. Try something different. There’s definitely someone out there who can get you back on track in just three sessions. Maybe it’ll take a tiny bit longer for you, simply because you first have to let go of that “ patient identity” from all those years of therapy. But twenty sessions? That’s the limit. Say goodbye to that idea.

And if you’re a therapist yourself and are thinking, “Edwin, I want to learn this too. I want to stop those endless talk sessions and achieve truly fast, lasting results with my clients"? Then come talk to us and take a course with us. I promise you: after just the first module, a whole new world will open up for you, and you’ll see that change doesn’t have to take months.

Let’s stop perpetuating dependency. Let’s go for fast, powerful results. Because it really can be that simple.

Come join the free masterclass on hypnotherapy to get started.

Or register directly for one of our events and trainings.

Have a question about our training? Schedule a 1-on-1 consultation here.

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