Relieve pain in the body in one session

During live sessions on Instagram in the summer of 2023, I helped Charlotte who has pain in her body. She really wanted to get rid of that.

Research shows that hypnotherapy is very effective for pain management and improving quality of life. It often helps even more than other psychological treatments, especially for chronic pain[1]. Reason enough to help Charlotte.

I asked her if she knew what was causing the pain, and I asked her if she had been to a doctor. Yes, she had. She had also been to Martijn Regeling and others, but she wanted me to help her.

I liked that, because it meant she was open to the suggestions I would give her. She also didn’t know what the problem was, and that’s ideal too. That’s when clients are most open to suggestions. If someone already knows everything, their receptiveness is much lower.

She had once had a conversation at home with a coach from work. Then she suddenly got a kind of fire feeling. She had had this before and thought it was related to stress . She was also healing from situations, but she was done with it now.

The desire was simply to stop forcing everything in the morning. That she could live more in gentleness. That forcing came through pain.

It did make sense to me that when you're in pain, you have to force more, and then you don't live comfortably in your gentleness. You just roll out of bed then.

She had to laugh really hard because she sees everything in images. It is always helpful in hypnotherapy if you have a client who has a great imagination.

She started experiencing pain from her back to her arms at least a year earlier. This felt like fire to her.

I asked her what that would look like if she made a picture of it. Then it was like there was fire around her at the places where there was pain. It reminded me of some kind of superhero with fire arms. She really liked this idea.

The idea that she could turn her pain, into her strength. She liked that, but she wanted the fire to go right out.

Yes, she obviously had to master that "power." I gave her the idea that she has to control the fire inside her instead of it swallowing her up. Just like all other superheroes who have to learn to control their powers.

"You need to control that fire in you, because right now it's swallowing up and that hurts."

Then she suddenly felt something in her neck area. About that, I gave the suggestion:

"Yes, because you have to speak out. You have to throw it out. This (pointing neck) is the center that it needs to get out. You want it gone. But that fire 'that instead of it swallowing me, of course I can use it for strength', for example."

I briefly revisited how it all started. It became clear when the coach from work stopped by, but she had also experienced it in phases before that. She believed those phases were caused by stress.

That stress came from a previous relationship. You could tell from her that she did not have pleasant memories of it. She also preferred not to talk about it. Then she blamed herself for not getting over it five years later.

On this, I gave the following suggestion:

"But yes, there are people who 50 years later are still not over something. Someone else who cremates his wife and the next day he has another one. Yeah, you have another one, too. That one throws his wife in the oven and his other wife who then goes with the next ... Or maybe he's already at the funeral even with another one. You also have those that you think, "Okay very soon, huh. Couldn't you have waited a long, long time?" Yes, you have those people too. Yes, I am also someone who does take a little longer. But well 5 years, plus there was another relationship in between?"

Yes, there was also a relationship in between, and that made Charlotte sore and stuffy too.

Social panorama

Then I said what would be interesting is to ask yourself how it could still affect you so much. I made use of her image thinking and indicated that that person is probably close by then anyway. I asked her to imagine where that person, who she had a relationship with five years earlier, where they would be standing in a room.

This is a technique we call the “social panorama ”[2]. It is covered in one of the courses offered by the Hypnosis Institute of the Netherlands.

She immediately indicated that this person was directly in front of her, standing against her. I asked her if he was not inside her. No, he was really standing against her.

Then I asked where the person stood from the relationship after him, but for what she has now.

Who stood a little further away.

I then gave her the following suggestion:

"Then I want you to take that ... one that's very close to you ... try to find a way to move it a little bit toward the other one."

This bothered her, because in her imagination, he was holding her throat.

I told her she could just take that hand away from her neck and push it away her way. I added a gesture, which she immediately copied.

While she said it worked, she also said it came back.

"Yes, then you slide it just as far until it's with the other person ... and then you snap it. That that one can't go back. Click... And then you clean it here (gesture for the body). So that he can't go back either. Can you do that?"

Charlotte was at this for a while, but it still came back again and again.

"Okay, so what does he need to do nice and different? To just go further away?.... To stay there?"

The first thing she said was “love,” the second was a splash of water 😊.

Finding feeling and symbolic giving

I decided to start with love and asked her to close her eyes and find a moment in her own life when she experienced a lot of love. She was able to recall such a moment .

I asked her what color that feeling was if she were to give it a color. With her, it was blue.

"Then you find a way to send that blue color to that person..."

I gave her a moment and then asked if he assumed that blue color of love. He was.

"Okay, very good. Well, then he completely fills up with that blue color... You see him smiling full of love too... and you slide him to that spot and you slide him to a spot where he feels fine and where you feel fine... and when you get to that spot you snap him there.... He nice in that blue color... and when it's all right and you've cleaned it all up a little bit... In the sense of kind of energetically, or just the place where it was before is free again, then you open your eyes and you're there again."

She struggled for a moment to open her eyes. I indicated that this was true, because they can't open until you've done what the suggestion said. I asked her how it felt now when she thought of that person.

It felt lighter, but she still felt something at her neck. As if someone grabbed her by the throat. When I asked who that was then, it was still that man.

Then I asked her what he needed to release.

Charlotte: "Freedom."

I suggested that she close her eyes again and search her memories for a moment when she felt completely free . To feel that sensation fully throughout her body. To assign a color to that feeling and to send that color to him as well.

In this case, it was white. She could send that one to him. Just until he let go of that grip and is just comfortable with himself again. "He's free, he can be free. Totally fine. He's just comfortable in that spot, and that hand is gone. You just keep going until it is. When it's done, you open your eyes and you're back here."

For this, she took another moment. She was struggling to open her eyes again and was impatient to get this done.

I indicated to her that what took a very long time for her did not take long at all for me. It often seems long to the client, but it really isn't that long.

When I asked what happened now when she thought about it, she indicated that it felt calmer and more liberated.

She still had the fiery feeling a little, but at least it had diminished.

Marvel

When you think about it, it's pretty extraordinary that when you put someone aside, the fervor diminishes as well. So just like a superhero, she was transforming it as something powerful. This I said and I said:

"I don't know you personally, but you strike me as a fiery type."

She agreed.

"You have many different types of people. Sensitive, water type and so on. Also combinations of those. More floaty, lighthearted. You have those, too. How would you characterize yourself?"

Indeed, Charlotte did consider herself fiery and with spunk. At the same time, she felt it was important that she ground, otherwise she could just fly away.

Then I was able to give her the suggestion that from the right mixture of earth (sand) and fire, you can make the hardest metal. That's a great metaphor. You don't want the fire to scorch you, but you also don't want to dampen it with earth. If you have just the right mixture, you will go like a rocket.

With that thought, she could imagine the fire going up in smoke. Just like how those previous relationships had gone up in smoke. She had also learned a lot so she would not be metaphorically grabbed by the throat again.

Now she felt another hand anyway, but from someone else.

Then I was able to point out, "Apparently you keep getting grabbed in one way or another. It's helpful then to think to yourself: What is it in me that I allow myself to be grabbed in this way? What now makes me pick out people, maybe other relationships, maybe how you grew up, maybe other experiences that you pick out people who want to determine what you feel and then grab you so by the neck (figuratively)?

Maybe you grew up that way. I don't know, but somewhere a pattern has developed that you gather people around you who grab you anyway."

She did recognize this idea. In her mind, people were also passing by. She was ready for that. Coincidentally, it was three people, and in the training of the Hypnosis Institute Netherlands, we say that when there are three, there is a pattern.

I asked her what is the common thread with those people now? What are these people and what is it that causes me to allow these people? What is that in me that filled those people up?

With her, "happiness" came to mind. So I could already give her the phrase of the week:

"Happiness can never be found outside yourself. You do not find it in the outside world, because you are it and you cannot find what you are."

Here she was in complete agreement.

Hierarchy as the real problem

I asked a few more questions if there was anything else.

She found that interesting because she also had to think about status.

I found that interesting, too. Because many people are driven by status, power or desire. Many people don't say this, while subconsciously it's really something.

It is very nice when you look up to someone in the beginning of a relationship, but at some point you are equal and then it can backfire.

She also found this very relatable.

I went on to say that many people initially position their partner higher than themselves. That love makes blind is often because of that higher position.

I asked her to imagine putting all those people at eye level in front of her. "Not down either, that you can look down on them. You can also do that the other way around. Also put them at a distance outside your circle of influence. Around you make it free, at least if you don't have a relationship, behind you you want to be supported. That can be by your father, mother... Grandpa and grandma would be cool too. Then you feel supported and secure. Like: I can be there. I am okay. Then you see everyone as they are. With their talents, ambitions and who is busy, but also that the other person is someone with problems, just like me.

If you're so involved with that now, what happens next?"

Her parents stood behind her with their hands on her shoulders. Behind them were her ancestors. They also made it clean and free for her. For her, this felt very liberating.

She also found equality to be an important value.

This is true, but what we humans often do is still unconsciously create a hierarchy. In some situations, that's helpful, too. This does not eliminate equality, but it is sometimes convenient. Like when a supermarket has a branch manager. That is then the top-dog.

When I said that, she actually went all wrong and a discussion ensued. About what work managers should do. I was able to show that illogic with the example of Elon Musk. Should he then put the Tesla's together all by himself to lead by example?

Then again, they didn't have to.

The point is that everyone has their own role. You’re no less than your boss, but there is a hierarchy. Everyone has a role and specific responsibilities. If everyone accepts that role, things go smoothly. Because if you don’t accept that “shelf-stocker” role, you’ll just end up doing something else.

You also don't have to stay in a relationship that doesn't work, but yes, you accept the role.

I can also say that all my children are equal. They get to do exactly what I do. That then becomes a mess. If I drive a car, my child may also drive. Then we would all be dead now.

So in some situations equality works fine and in others a hierarchy is more convenient.

But then you don't look up to those "higher-ups" right away. Of course, I can admire someone for their skills, like Elon Musk.

She found this interesting and from this I could conclude that hierarchy was a thing for her after all. I summarized that she looked up to people, but did not like hierarchy. She disliked that again. She recognized this image.

Then she still got the feeling of oppression. I indicated that may have been due to being a woman. After all, women have been oppressed throughout history. Even in the Bible, men are often mentioned by name and then suddenly "and his wife," well yummy is that. Only before the time of the Bible you also had high priestesses. Back then you didn't have that at all.

Now again, you have men who identify as women, but then they actually start suppressing women. You see this in sports, for example.

But it’s important to realize that this has nothing to do with you. So you can let go of that feeling. You can let go of that narrative of the oppressed woman.

And then when you walk in the store and you see that branch manager, you're just glad that he does and you don't. Then you don't look up to him, you admire him for doing that job. You admire someone for the skills and you're glad you don't have to do that yourself.

I also indicated all of this in the suggestion I gave Charlotte. That you can admire people too, without looking up to them. She was happy with that suggestion that already felt a lot better.

I went on to add to the good feeling:

"Imagine: If we were all one... Imagine that. All one and we all have a role to play. Then you're glad all these other people are taking those roles. Surely you shouldn't think when you see the roles people sometimes play that that was you.

Then I really think very often "Oh, how glad I am that you took this role man. Really top. I love you, top... Because I really think it's a k* role actually.""

I asked her how it felt now. She did feel calmer now. Her arms and back felt less fiery again. She also hoped it would stay that way.

With a lot of pains that have no obvious cause, and where doctors can't find anything physically or can't do anything about it, there is often still something that can be done about it, because pain is of the brain.

The brain then actually does it. Which then says there is a fiery feeling. Then you can imagine throwing water over it or something. You can do all kinds of things with your brain.

I pointed this out to her, and she was able to visualize it as well. She then mentioned that she had once been in an accident, but that she had stayed present in the moment and was able to figure out very well for herself what she could do for her brain. She had listened to a lot of classical music. So, in a way, she could already imagine what her brain was capable of and what she could do to reprogram herself.

I gave her some more examples on how she could ground herself with her thoughts and eliminate the fiery feeling. This all felt very relaxing to her. That everything didn't have to be so fiery and she didn't have to bang on about everything. Just nothing for a while.

Her body also felt calmer and more relaxed. Her arms also felt less like fire.

Then I was still able to give her the post-hypnotic suggestion. A post-hypnotic suggestion helps to keep the subconscious working even after treatment:

"Yes, it's getting less and less and less and all because now you've found more and more ways to deal with that. Or to deal with it, to solve it yourself ... and also tonight when you sleep and dream, this just goes on ... Because you will notice ... Yes, tomorrow when you get up, you think 'hey jump, maybe just the get out'. You think: it does seem better... oh, interesting... Yes, because something that has obviously been that way for years, that takes some time before it is worked out completely... And that is happening now yes, so that."

After that, everything actually felt very good and I was thanked by Charlotte.

Watch the entire session here.

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Sources:

[1] https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1078390319835604