Stop Scratching Yourself: Tips against self-mutilation

Children glorify self-mutilation. That's news someone told me a while ago. Cutting yourself and posting this on Instagram is apparently something that happens. Apparently there are also YouTube videos that explain how to do it. This is actually very sick and sad. If you cut yourself and like this you actually have a big problem and are (literally) not in your right mind.

To help yourself or others who cut themselves, in this blog I will go over what self-mutilation is, what can cause it and how to stop scratching yourself.

The Trimbos Institute estimates that 15% of all adolescents cut or otherwise hurt themselves or have ever done so(1). That's at least 2 kids in every school class. This can include pulling hair out of your head and scratching yourself with a knife.

What is self-mutilation?

Self-mutilation means cutting or damaging yourself. As mentioned, you can pull your hair out of your head or scratch yourself. If you hurt yourself in other ways, such as by hitting yourself, to deal with emotions this also counts as self-mutilation.

The consequences of self-mutilation can be very serious. For example, you can get bald spots and scars on your arm, or wherever you scratch yourself.

Research shows that self-mutilation can even lead to amputation(2). There is a case of a person who suffered acute psychosis, which damaged himself to the point that his hand eventually had to be amputated.

Children who bite their lips and tongue can also be a problem(3).

Therefore, if you don't stop self-mutilation, complications can occur that may require medical attention.

The causes of self-mutilation

Self-mutilation can be caused by stress. Children, or adolescents, who are seen as talented and therefore given extra tasks, such as tutoring for a particular talent, can sometimes become highly stressed.

Apparently, they need to live up to their talent.

To deal with that pressure, they can start cutting into themselves instead of talking about the problem with their parents.

Stress can also be caused by things other than pressure to live up to talents. Poor school performance, problems in the family and problems with friends can also be the cause of self-mutilation in adolescents.

Dealing with emotions and painful emotions needs to develop properly. If you find it difficult to deal with painful emotions, the likelihood of self-mutilation is greater.

Emotions that trigger self-mutilation may include:

Sense of worthlessness
Loneliness
Panic
Anger
Guilt
Rejection
Self-Hate
Confusion about sexuality

Having friends who cut themselves can make the barrier to cutting yourself lower that makes you want to do it too.

Adults can also hurt themselves on purpose. This may be because they never got through "the phase" because they did not learn alternatives to deal with the negative emotions.

Adults who grew up with molestation or sexual abuse are also more likely to develop self-mutilation.

In addition, in adults it is usually due to other mental problems.

As mentioned, people who experience acute psychosis can suffer from self-mutilation.

In addition, it is also a symptom in some people with borderline disorder.

People with Lesch-Nyhan syndrome, Joubert plus syndrome, depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress or eating disorders are also more likely to hurt themselves.

People with addiction problems, such as alcohol addiction or drug addiction, can also mutilate themselves while under the influence(4).

People who help themselves cut

Ideally, of course, you wouldn't want anyone around you to cut themselves or otherwise hurt themselves. There are several ways to help someone who scratches themselves.

If it's your child

If your child cuts himself it is easy to blame the cat for it, but it is very important not to look away. Don't get mad at your child for cutting himself or otherwise hurting himself. Don't yell or blame him/her either.

Instead, express to your child that you are concerned about his health and seek help. After all, there may be a medical cause for scratching in addition to a mental cause.

If it's your (teenage) friend

Indicate that he/she can tell his/her parents, a teacher or a confidant at school. These can take steps to initiate help.

If it's an adult

Encourage the person to find medical or mental help.

Tips to stop cutting your arm/yourself

On the contrary, if you are someone who scratches themselves or otherwise hurts themselves, there are also many things you can do to stop this.

For example, research shows that strengthening the bond between parents and child in adolescence and adolescence and parents paying attention to their children helps reduce self-mutilation(5).

Tip 1: Talk to your family about your problems

Talking to your family can help strengthen your bonds. If possible, express to your parents what you are struggling with and that you cannot solve it. They probably have ideas to help you, but may also be afraid of upsetting you with well-meaning tips.

If you yourself notice your child cutting themselves, it is important to give your child attention . This does not always have to be a serious conversation, but it can be. For example, spend a day doing something fun with your child and tell him/her.

Tip #2: Sleep more

The same research also shows that good sleep hygiene helps you hurt yourself less. For an adult, for example, it is important to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night to be well rested. The same is even more true for adolescents.

Getting enough sleep during the day also helps you deal with problems better, reducing the urge to harm yourself.

Tip 3: Don't use narcotics

If you find that drinking wine or taking drugs causes you to scratch or otherwise hurt yourself faster is important to stop doing so.

Hypnotherapy can work very well against addiction. In doing so, also seek medical help for an addiction that your body also becomes dependent on.

Tip 4: Identify what your triggers are

In general, stress and negative emotions are triggers for cutting yourself. By keeping a journal, you can identify what triggers you to cut yourself. By identifying those triggers, such as lack of sleep, or a bad day at work or school, you can see if you can't deal with them differently.

Tip 5: Meditate

Because stress is a major factor in scratching yourself, it is important to use relaxation techniques. By meditating for 10 minutes daily, you can already significantly reduce the amount of stress hormones in your body.

If you find it hard to sit still, yoga is also a good way to relax.

Tip 6: Use hypnosis and self-hypnosis

Self-mutilation is usually changed with cognitive behavioral therapy(6) and you can reinforce that form of therapy with hypnosis.

Hypnosis has long been used to solve problems. For example, hypnosis helps with eating disorders and also to stop self-mutilation. Through self-hypnosis, it is possible to process traumatic experiences.

Through regression , the situation that caused hurting yourself to be something you use to solve emotional problems can also be looked at more closely. By looking back at it with different eyes, it is also possible to find a different solution.

In addition, the effects of hypnosis are enhanced if you use self-hypnosis in addition. This can strengthen beliefs about your new healthy behavior and weaken beliefs that cause self-mutilation.

Tip 7: Use mindfulness

In the treatment of self-mutilation, writing down thoughts is also recommended. A good way to chart thoughts is to apply mindfulness . In mindfulness, you try to live in the here and now, but this can be disrupted by thoughts.

You can then write down the thought. The subject of the thought and the emotion that goes with it. This is also a good way to figure out triggers even before you are actually working to harm yourself.

Using mindfulness can also help you stop thoughts that diminish your self-confidence more quickly. As a result, you can improve self-compassion as well.

Tip 8: Exercise regularly

Research also shows that exercising regularly can reduce the urge to hurt yourself. Researchers do say that more research is needed on this, but initial results are promising(7).

If you're not much for exercise, yoga is already a good start and a walk is also nice.

Want to learn more about mental techniques to help yourself or others? Then come to a free online master class on hypnosis or register for training.

Also pin this handy infographic as a reminder:

stop scratching yourself

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