Do you often feel like you don't know who you are or how to identify yourself? Do you feel that emotions are easily aroused and stay with you longer than you see in people around you? Do you often attribute good qualities to people after which you become deeply disappointed in them? Then there is a chance that you suffer from borderline. Ultimately, a psychologist or psychiatrist really needs to diagnose this, but if this seems recognizable to you, there is a chance.
To cope well with borderline, in this article I will go over the symptoms, give you a small mini-test and also give mental tips.
What is borderline
Borderline is also called bps because it is full-blown borderline personality disorder. This sounds quite serious, but this disorder is fairly common and many people can still live fairly normal lives.
So it's not a condition that stands in the way of success, but it does make for deep lows and high highs.
If you suffer from borderline disorder (bps), emotions are easily evoked and can be experienced deeply. In addition, it is very difficult to make sure the emotion goes away so you can stay in the emotion for a long time. This can cause you to feel completely super for a time, as this is also true of positive emotions, of course, but it also causes deep valleys when negative emotions are evoked.
People with borderline are often very enthusiastic, idealistic, cheerful and loving.
Unfortunately, negative emotions such as anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, worry and anger can be overwhelming for someone with bps.
As a result, people with borderline are also sensitive to rejection, criticism, isolation and feelings of failure. This sensitivity makes them more likely to develop other disorders, such as depression, anorexia, fear of failure and self-mutilation.
This is precisely why it is important to have techniques that can curb negative emotions before they lead to further mental complications.
The symptoms of borderline
The most common borderline symptoms are:
- Impaired self-esteem.
- Lots of effort to avoid abandonment.
- Black-and-white thinking.
- Being very impulsive.
- Emotional outbursts out of proportion to the event.
- Unstable and chaotic relationships.
- Disassociation (the feeling of not being there for a while and "waking up").
People with borderline also often have anorexia, depressive symptoms, anxiety, anger or addictions.
Borderline test
To really know if you have borderline, it is wise to get tested by a psychologist, but we are making a small start (these results are not a diagnosis, for that you really need to see a psychologist or psychiatrist). Indicate for yourself whether these statements are true or false:
- I often find myself doing any of the following: driving unsafely, having unsafe sex, drinking too much or taking drugs, eating too much at once, gambling or spending money carelessly.
- When I am very stressed I am sometimes out of it and often feel like I "wake up" from thoughts but then I don't really know what I have been doing for the last 5 minutes.
- I often idealize other people, when I just meet them I trust them completely, but after a while I feel that they are not interested at all and or don't care.
- I can get very angry, sarcastic and bitter. I then find this difficult to control.
- I have at times (threatened) to commit suicide or mutilate myself.
- I can very abruptly change the way I look at my life and with it my career goals.
- I am very afraid of other people leaving me and do everything I can to prevent this, even if my suspicions are unfounded.
- I can sometimes be in a totally different mood for hours or days, with depression symptoms, anxiety or other negative emotions.
- My romantic relationships are intense, but usually not long-lasting.
- I have so many emotional issues in my life that it is problematic for my studies/work, family relationships and romantic relationships.
If most of these statements strike you as true for you, there is a chance you have borderline. However, this is not a diagnosis. Therefore, always see a doctor before seeking treatment for something you do not have.
Mental tips for people with borderline
Because emotions have a great impact on people with borderline, it is important to keep a close eye on your mental state and make adjustments as needed to prevent further complications.
Generally, borderline is treated with dialectical behavioral therapy. An important part of this is mindfulness. Through mindfulness, you are aware of your current emotions and can use techniques to direct those emotions in the right direction.
Use mindfulness 2.
Mindfulness is a way to live in the here and now and also to be able to distance yourself more from your emotions.
For example, there is a form of mindfulness meditation where you name every thought that comes to mind, such as a thought about an event in your family name your family and the emotion that goes with it, such as love or in the case of a not so nice thought: irritation, anger, disappointment. Then you resume your meditation and observe your thoughts instead of experiencing your thoughts.
Research conducted in 2016 also shows that mindfulness training alongside dialectical behavioral therapy can enhance outcomes(1). Thus, it can significantly reduce symptoms.
Meditate 10 minutes a day 2.
In addition to dialectical behavioral therapy, people with borderline are given tips on how to use their lifestyle to reduce borderline symptoms. One way to reduce symptoms is through stress management. One step in this is the use of meditation.
In fact, meditating 10 minutes a day can do an awful lot to reduce stress levels.
In addition, research conducted in 2016 shows that loving kindness meditation promotes acceptance, mindfulness and self-compassion for people with borderline disorder and actually reduces self-criticism(2).
Attend a yoga class 3.
Y
oga is a relaxation and movement technique that is widely used and can also be a solution for people with mental health issues. In 2005, the effect of a yoga class on mood was studied in people with mood problems, such as people with extreme depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia and 20 more types of disorders, as well as people with borderline disorder.
During this yoga class, the focus is on stretching muscles and to do it mindfully. You then feel how your body moves to move slowly with one fluid movement to the next pose. At the end, relaxing poses were used, such as the corpse pose.
The study found that taking a yoga class had a positive effect. Five negative emotions, such as depressive thoughts, anxiety, anger and confusion were reduced by the class. Even after taking multiple classes, the positive results remained(3).
Eat healthy 4.
Research shows that eating healthy foods, with omega 3 and adequate vitamins and minerals, are also good for the brain. Eating healthy food also ensures that your brain gets the nutrients it needs to function properly.
For example, research shows that omega 3 can help(4). Omega 3 can be found in olive oil, fish and nuts, among others. You can also take supplements. Always consult with your doctor before taking supplements.
Maintain a day and night rhythm 5.
Sleep is incredibly important for your brain. This is the time when it comes to rest and process the day's impressions. Sleeping between 7 and 10 hours a night ensures that your brain can recharge for the next day.
Research shows that people with borderline disorder tend to sleep less than the average person. This may explain the symptoms(5).
Avoid stress 6.
Too much work, too many appointments; there are many reasons why you may suffer from stress. To suffer less from borderline disorder, it is important to avoid or reduce stress. Therefore, try to create a work environment that works for you and does not cause too much stress.
Exercise regularly 7.
Exercise is important to reduce stress. Regular exercise can cause adrenaline and other stress hormones to be worked out of your body, reducing the impact of this. Daily walks, mindful if necessary, and a few times a week of vigorous exercise can help. Yoga is also part of sports, so that's nice.
Borderline is a disorder in which emotions are often amplified and can remain long-lasting. Especially with negative emotions, this can have unpleasant consequences. Therefore, it is important to try to reduce symptoms with mindfulness, rest, regularity and a healthy diet.
Want to learn more about mental techniques to improve your own life, or the lives of others? Then come to a seminar or check out Hypnosis Institute Netherlands' training courses.
Sources:
http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12671-016-0492-1
http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/cpp.2000/abstract
http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/prj/28/4/399/
http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/doi/abs/10.1176/appi.ajp.160.1.167
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/016503279090078M
