Society is polarized. This is a statement you often read in the newspaper. The interesting thing is that this happens very easily, even easier than you think. For example, something you often hear which is bad is that there is polarization where rich people are getting richer and poor people are getting poorer[1]. Another statement is that it is down to the media[2], this is for example why Polish politicians criticize their media.
Social media is also often blamed for polarization, such as in England during the Brexit debate[3].
In polarizing, you actually have three parties instead of two. One party gets just a little more than the other and the third party looks on nicely.
Polarizing is very easy
That's how it works with everything and everyone - we always find something in someone, and that can be the very beginning of polarization.
For example, I find some statements quite funny when it comes to polarizing. When someone starts with, "Guys let's not polarize like that right now," I already know something about polarization is coming. Usually something like, "What difference does it make that one person thinks or does this and another thinks or does that?" That question alone has a presupposition that it already matters, otherwise you wouldn't ask that question. Apparently it matters. You start polarizing yourself.
Let's all connect in light and love. But what if I don't want to? Then we have a challenge, because then I won't be there.
Another polarization is perpetrator and victim. On social media some time ago, such a story had gone completely viral. For example, a girl, boy or transgender person had been beaten up. A girl who didn't know what she was now or what her sexual identity was. She had been beaten up by boys. This got all over social media and her father had also posted a picture about it. On it came the quote, "You can be who you are, and I can be who I am." Then I wonder if everyone who shared that meant it.
So okay, the victim is allowed to be who he or she is. Absolutely, the person is allowed to be who he or she is and everyone is allowed to be. I agree. Whether you think you are a man, a woman or a canary, I mean that.
What about the offender? No, not that one.
That one is interesting isn't it?
If you can be who you are, an offender, then I can be who I am, the victim.
And everyone shares. Rainbow flags and other things, because "we support you. The other person is not allowed to do that. You're not allowed to beat someone up. The law doesn't allow that either.
Okay, so everyone is allowed to be who they are within the confines of the law.
In Poland, you are not allowed to be gay by law. That is not meant to be, then, because that law is again not good.
The law in a Middle Eastern country where women are not allowed to do anything? No, they're not allowed either.
So okay, we are going to determine what are and are not good laws in other countries. So our will is law or our law is our will and anything that fits into that is fine. That one belongs and the other one doesn't.
That's what I mean by polarizing.
Reduce polarization by connecting in light and love
If you truly connect with light and love, then you also understand the group of young people who beat her up. Then you feel as much love for them as you do for that girl.
That is the essence of spirituality in Jeans. I believe that I am allowed to be the way I am, so I must also accept that other people are the way they are.
This is very easy to say, but this is still quite difficult to do.
So what if the guy is a rapist? No then no, but what if it's a mother who has abused or neglected her children? No, not that either.
But what if that mother now works a hundred hours a week to put food on the table and that the children are neglected as a result and then suddenly become violent? Yes, then you soon don't know.
Ultimately, you can only stay with yourself, so "I am allowed to be as I am. I'm allowed to be like myself. With all my quirks, geekiness and shadow sides. But even shadow sides I don't want to use, because then I polarize myself.
But there are some things you don't say and then they stay in the dark, in the shadows.
Trauma in this way often remains I your shadow side. A side of you that you are afraid to show. Which everyone else sees, because it always comes shining through.
That's why it's good to resolve trauma.
But so I get to be who I am with all the trimmings and I get to work with it to solve problems and traumas. Then if I'm allowed to be who I am, that's okay.
If someone else then in their own way becomes the whiner of the neighborhood, I have to accept and even respect that.
Perhaps I should even look at it with compassion .
Even to the killer, rapist and group that beats people up and kills just anyone. Can you?
That's not easy, that's the hardest thing there is.
But if we are all 1-one, that one belongs too.
No "except those...
See each other and connect in light and love.
I can't always do that either. When I read that news report, I also at once feel sorry for the victim and immediately find some of that other group. Until I saw the quote, then I thought, "If I can be who I am, then others can be who they are."
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Don't get caught up in polarization
As I stated at the beginning of this blog, polarization involves three parties. The third party who watches the polarization mostly, but tries not to participate in it. No matter how difficult this is. This also prevents you from turning into an extremist of one of the two poles/sides.
In fact, polarization is also something that happens at the individual level. In practical terms, it often means that you have quite a bias in your knowledge of a particular topic. You only want to look at a certain topic in one way and also see the topic only through that one interpretation. You cannot see the other side and you also get mental dissonance when you get information that contradicts your ideas about the topic. If you then come across something again that is one with you, it is all the more fun to delve into that and then you automatically go further into polarization and become a little more extreme.
This can even be a problem for people who need to make decisions, such as politicians. When they have to make a decision quickly, there is often no room left to consider new information when making the decision. So then decisions are made without being able to consider all the information[4].
Just being aware of this phenomenon makes it easier to distance yourself from topics that initially grab you. Like the story of the girl, I was able to distance myself from that to consider why those young people did that and what kind of environment you might have come from to be able to do that. So looking at both sides with compassion.
Releasing that polarization can be done in several ways. Initially, being aware of what polarizes you against your fellow man is already a very good first step.
In addition, you may wonder why you give so much importance to a theme that you give the theme the power to make it turn you against other people. These are often your beliefs. You can examine these and change them with hypnotherapy, for example through regression. That way you can find out how illogical and unhelpful certain thoughts actually are, and that makes it easier to be more the third party to a polarizing theme.
In addition, you can also repeat daily certain suggestions that help you not get caught up in polarizations, such as:
A world without enemies is the best world.
Everyone is doing their best to make the world a better place.
I don't have to have an opinion on everything.
Everyone is equal, with no exceptions.
I don't have to take sides.
These are just examples, depending on your beliefs and how much you suffer from polarization within yourself, you can get other suggestions from a hypnotherapist. In addition, there are numerous other hypnosis techniques that can help you avoid going along with polarization.
Want to learn more about how hypnosis works? Then come to the free online master class on hypnosis.
Or enroll in one of our training courses. Ideal if you want to help yourself or others.
