Are you wearing a mask outside the home, or when you are with others? Are you not yourself, but someone you think you should be? This can take an awful lot of energy. In this blog article, we will take a closer look at the mask that many people have on and how to take off your mask.
Social Mask
Somewhere, everyone has a social mask. This is also sometimes just necessary to have a healthy social life, but this can become a problem if your social mask is too far from your true self [1].
Your mask develops from childhood. When you are little, social mistakes are still forgiven, but you often get a brief comment about how you are "supposed" to behave from your parents or other older family members.
Sometimes you also just have a mask on because you are processing things that are private. If a colleague asks you "How are you?", of course you say "good," but does a good friend ask this with whom you can talk about problems? Then you can tell what's going on.
Developing your mask was called your persona by Jung, a psychologist/philosopher. It is important to develop it in a healthy way in order to be happy in your adult life as well.
But what if you always have your mask on or it has developed incorrectly due to wrong upbringing or other influences?
Function of the social mask
So the social mask's function is to make you socially accepted and perhaps even admired. With that, the mask can give you opportunities in your life through which you can improve your life.
Depending on how you shape your social mask, it can help you with your self-confidence and self-esteem[2].
Autism and the social mask
People with autism also often feel they have to pretend to be someone with "normal" neurological connections. The social mask then becomes a survival strategy in situations where autism is not understood or accepted.
It also allows them to have different masks, such as in school, at parties with peers and at work.
However, this social mask can take a lot of energy, both physically and mentally.
In autism, for example, putting on a mask means making eye contact when they don't really want to. Putting a smile on their face when they actually get too much stimulus and practicing how to talk to someone they just met.
People with autism can imitate peers. Talk the same way, pick up hobbies that classmates have and even adopt clothing styles.
Many people with autism mask because they want to feel normal, to fit in more with other people so that people act nicer and the world is less "hostile."
Putting on a mask can sometimes lead to anxiety and sometimes lead to depression, but for people with autism, it is not yet entirely clear how these differences in negative consequences arise[3].
Taking off your mask can be powerful
In some subcultures, a mask is something that is difficult to take off. American research on black women shows that these women find it more difficult for women of a different skin color to seek mental support when they need it.
This is due in part to the development of the mask of "the strong black woman" and what this means for well-being. For example, the image of this mask was adjusted so that this mask does not hinder women from asking for help when needed[4].
So taking off your mask can be the first step to finding help and becoming truly powerful.
Hypnosis to take off your mask
Putting on your mask is something you can do very subconsciously. You find yourself in a certain situation, such as at work, and before you know it you have put on your "work mask." This is automatic behavior.
With hypnosis, you can learn to break this automatic behavior in order to be more conscious[5]. This allows you to adjust your "work-mask" to better fit your inner self.
You can also think of your mask as your social role. You take on the role of scholar at school and the role of mother, or daughter (father or son) at home, and so there are more roles and masks to think of.
That role you once took on, or this mask, because it's something you get from your environment and because you make your own observations and assumptions about what works best in certain situations. So those are based on how you perceive reality.
Hypnosis helps you with:
- Revisiting your reality.
- What you pay attention to and are aware of.
- Your imagination.
- Disconnecting certain associations (such as your social mask in certain contexts).
- Suggestibility.
- The connection between your body and mind[6].
Finding out the cause of the mask
When a hypnotherapist helps someone take off the mask, they often first look at the cause of your mask. In the preliminary interview, for example, a person may indicate where his or her mask is "bothering" him or her. For example, does someone act more extroverted than he or she is because he thinks that is important? That people expect that of him?
Then someone can also indicate where they think this is coming from. This may be true, but sometimes not.
Usually regression is used to find the moment when someone decided that a particular mask was smart to put on. Usually these are situations from your childhood, because that is when you decide how the world works and how you function best in it.
However, as a child, you are far from having all the knowledge and those "rules" often don't really get updated, so they can cause problems in your adult life. As a result, you can inadvertently have a very tiresome mask on.
Hypnotherapy helps people revisit the situation you saw as a child, to repair the limiting beliefs that have arisen. You then revisit the reality you saw at the time, so to speak, but with your adult knowledge.
That alone can do much to help you release your social mask.
Changing Focus
Something else you can do is change your focus . After all, if you look every time for confirmation that your mask is doing what's needed, you might as well be yourself for once and then look for confirmation that that's exactly what's helpful.
For example, are you more introverted than you pretend to be? At work, be a little less "funny" and do what you do best. Maybe then your colleagues will suddenly find you even more fun and collegial, because less work will be left on the shelf. Then you can get very different positive signals from your colleagues.
Regression can also help you change your focus, so that you see things differently now and therefore adjust your mask to yourself.
Taking off your mask visualizing
The use of metaphors and symbols also plays a big role in hypnosis. For example, you can visualize literally taking off a mask; this can signal to your subconscious that you are allowed to be more yourself in certain situations.
For example, you can visualize how you take off your "work mask" before you go to work and how you act as your true self at work and toward your colleagues. This makes it easier to actually do this in "real life."
Especially during parties or other situations, do you find yourself wearing a mask? Then you can also visualize taking off your mask for those parties and being there as your true-self celebrating the party.
This can also be combined with repeat suggestions such as:
"I get to be myself."
"I am good enough the way I am."
"I only find people who fit me when I am myself."
These are just examples. Depending on your reasons for your mask, a hypnotherapist may offer other suggestions.
Learn Hypnosis
Do you want to help yourself or others take off their social mask and be more themselves? Then knowledge of hypnosis is indispensable.
Come to a free master class for an introduction.
Or register directly for one of our events and trainings. You can take the training in class in Assendelft, or you can join the classes live at home. You are then with a live video connection to the lessons in Assendelft. This is ideal if you do not live in the area, or if you can't come to our location.
Have a question about our training? Schedule a 1-on-1 consultation here to see if the training fits your goals.
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