What you can learn from the city

Some time ago, I wrote a blog about what you can learn from the countryside. In fact, research shows that urbanites and people from rural areas handle stress differently. Just as urbanites can learn something from rural people, rural people can also learn something from urbanites.

Therefore, in this article, I discuss traits of urban people that rural people can learn from.

Closing Incentives

As I wrote in the previous article , there are an overwhelming number of stimuli. Since absorbing all of these stimuli isn’t healthy, people in the city have developed a sort of shield that allows them to quickly switch their focus from what’s important to what isn’t.

If you need to stay focused, this skill is incredibly useful. One way to block out stimuli and distractions is by practicing mindfulness.

With mindfulness, you make sure your attention is in the here and now and with what you are doing. For example, you can walk mindfully while paying attention to the path you are on, you can apply mindfulness in the same way when you are engaged in something else.

This is very useful, for example, if you are easily distracted by the presence of the Internet.

Be able to better deal with negative emotions

If you live in the city, you’re constantly confronted with negative stimuli that seem to signal that you’re failing ( 1). The honking immediately after a traffic light turns green signals that you have a slow reaction time. The angry glare from someone having a bad day can be a sign that you apparently pose a threat that must be countered with an angry glare.

This can evoke negative emotions, but if you let it get to you too much, you can’t live in the city. As a result, you learn to set priorities regarding which negative stimuli you should and shouldn’t be open to. What your family and friends think of you is ultimately more important than what a stranger thinks of you.

By distinguishing, even in rural areas, between social control that you do care about — such as your friends’ opinions — and social control that you don’t care about—such as your neighbors’ opinions—you can be a lot more yourself.

Are healthier

Research shows that people in the city live healthier lives than those in rural areas. This is a surprising finding in itself, yet it’s also easy to explain. In the city, you’ll find a gym on every street corner, whereas they’re scarce in rural areas.

In the process, city people care a little less about what other people think of you. So running around the neighborhood is much less "public" than if you do it in your village.

Fortunately, the Internet offers a lot of relief if you don't have a gym around the corner and don't want to run through the neighborhood. There are many online workouts available there that you can simply perform at home.

More concerned with nutrition

In addition, city dwellers are often more focused on mindful eating. This is partly because cities are much more likely to have specialty stores that sell only organic food, and there’s also a wider selection of specialty restaurants where you can enjoy mindful meals.

Then again, in rural areas you often have to travel more miles to get to that conscious store or cafe.

Dare to stick your head above the parapet, though

Because of the Internet, opportunities are available everywhere. Both rural and urban. Therefore, rural people still need to learn 1 characteristic from city people, which is to do with your head above the ground.

There are often plenty of job opportunities in cities, but right now there are still more job seekers than jobs. That’s why it’s very important to be unique and stand out. Especially in a city where there are dozens—and sometimes hundreds—of people available for every job opening, it’s important to showcase your qualities and “shine” when the moment arises.

Believe in yourself

Believing in your own strengthis therefore very important, no matter what other people say. To believe in yourself, you need confidence in your abilities—and the courage to take that extra step that sets you apart and leads to success.

If you find it difficult to take that extra step, hypnotherapy can help you explore why you’re not doing so. Sometimes certain beliefs can hold you back, such as the belief that “Just act normal—that’s crazy enough.” It may also become clear during such a hypnotherapy session that your self-confidence needs to be boosted.

With hypnotherapy, beliefs can be changed and it can help increase self-confidence.

In addition, self-hypnosis can work well to increase self-confidence. In self-hypnosis, you first relax and close your eyes. Then you repeat suggestions the hypnotherapist has given you to increase your self-confidence. Depending on what you want to achieve, these may vary from person to person. They may be similar to the following suggestions:

"I'm good at what I do."

"I have the knowledge for success."

"I decide what to do with my life."

Maintaining relationships

Okay, in rural areas, relationships are just as important as they are in the city, but there’s less competition. That can make maintaining a healthy relationship a challenge. Because there are fewer alternatives, you might feel like you have no choice but to stay with the person you’re with, and you might feel that your partner or friends will stick around anyway, since there’s nothing else out there.

In a city, rudeness can lead to a breakup much more quickly—after all, new friends can be found everywhere. This makes it all the more important to keep a relationship fun. There are several ways to do this.

Date night

Especially if you have busy lives, it is important to do something together on a regular basis. This is what date night was created for. It is a way to share fun experiences with each other when they don't often come your way "spontaneously."

Mindfulness for your relationship

Another way to keep your relationship strong is by practicing mindfulness in your relationship. When you’re on that date night, make sure you’re truly immersed in the moment. This allows you to really listen to the other person and give thoughtful answers to questions. Another nice bonus is that the experience feels more intense and stays with you longer.

Privacy is important

In the city, there are always people around you. If you are unlucky you live in an apartment with all narrow walls and you can hear the neighbors' television, but unfortunately also their arguments or if they are making up romantically.

Keeping your privacy is important because of this. It is very common for people in the city to guard their privacy by wearing earphones on their phones that may or may not be on. It is also a good signal that you are not open to human interaction at that moment. Thereby, of course, it is also a way to cut yourself off from stimuli.

If you tend to tell everyone everything when they ask for it and find that this gets you into trouble, mindfulness can be a good way to be less bothered by this.

By being mindful during conversations, you can make more conscious choices about how you answer questions. By living in the moment, you listen more attentively and can therefore better determine what you do and don’t say. When you do speak, you’re also less likely to get distracted by what you’re saying.

Who hasn’t started a conversation about how delicious an apple tastes and ended up talking about the family dinner you had a few years ago? By being mindful in conversations, you can better stay on the topic you really want to discuss.

City life is a life where you are constantly protecting yourself. From living in the city, you can learn several things, namely how to shut yourself off from stimuli when it otherwise becomes too much for you for a while.

This can be done, for example, by meditating daily to have a stimulus-free moment.

In addition, research shows that city dwellers tend to live healthier lives than people in rural areas. Of course, this is also because in cities there is more supply for sports and healthy food than in villages where there is 1 supermarket to go to. Fortunately, with the advent of the Internet, much is also possible in rural areas.

For people in the city, having self-confidence is also important, just as it is in the country. To be successful, you have to believe in yourself wherever you live. Self-confidence can be boosted with meditation and hypnosis.

Building relationships is also important in the city as there is competition from other individuals everywhere who also want to build relationships. Using mindfulness in conversations can be a good way to strengthen bonds and tell only what you want to tell. This way you protect your relationship and yourself from the wrong relationships.

Would you like to learn more about mental techniques that can improve your life? Then come to a seminar or check out the courses offered by the Hypnosis Institute of the Netherlands.

Sources:

http://www.journalclub.co.uk/resources/Abbott%20(2011)%20City%20living%20marks%20the%20brain.pdf

http://sa.indiaenvironmentportal.org.in/files/City%20living.pdf

http://www.theprospect.net/4-life-lessons-from-living-in-a-city-39417