The rut, the same thing day in and day out, it can occur in all kinds of situations. You have drudgery at work, drudgery in your relationship, drudgery in your daily life at home, and it's getting pretty boring. But how do you break through the rut in such a way that you don't have to change course right away? That's what this blog is about.
Breaking the rut in your relationship
The rut most people want to break is the rut in your relationship. You do everything the same by now and can pretty much predict what your partner is going to say. You know that you have sex every Sunday, if you're lucky, that it's always the same position and has the same introduction. You have date-night every Thursday, but you choose the same restaurant and the same food every time.
Boring, yawn, duller, dullest. There is nothing more to it, but at the same time you are very much in love with your partner so only the rut needs to go out. The relationship may just stay.
So what do you do?
Of course, you can do the hypnosis training and hypnotize your partner to act out your wildest fantasies 😉.
But seriously, the best thing you can do is to get out of your comfort zone with your partner.
You can do the date night on a different night. You can agree to alternate (i.e., one time you, the other time your partner) what you will do on the date night.
You can innocently ask what the other person would change first to spice up their sex life so you can try new dings without the other person feeling immediately threatened by it.
What you can do together is make a wish list of things you want to do together. This could be a vacation, a date-night activity or an activity at night 😉.
Next, you can start finishing this list together.
If you feel you can't do this, it could be that something is blocking you. For example, a certain thought or belief may be keeping you from doing the date-night on another day or from experimenting in bed with your partner.
So what is then and where does this come from?
You may feel like you don't have time to be flexible on date nights.
In this case, hypnosis can help you figure out where that blockage is coming from today. In conversational hypnosis, for example, a hypnotist can already help you with a Socratic conversation that includes the why question or a variation of it to find out if you have a particular fear to break the rut.
Then the hypnotist can help you, for example, with suggestions to help you overcome that fear of breaking the rut.
These may include suggestions such as:
"Your partner loves you and is open to your ideas."
"Your partner has many positives."
"You're with your partner in a familiar situation," says Dr. K. K., "and you're with your partner in a familiar situation."
These are just examples, depending on your beliefs and fears, a hypnotherapist can help you with other suggestions to break the rut in your relationship.
Breaking the daily grind
Then you may also have a daily grind in general that you want to break. The rut of eating, working, eating, TV-hanging (or whatever you do) and sleeping and then repeating this rut.
Sigh.
What you can do to break the rut in general is determine what is your one big thing right now that you would like to do differently.
What really stands out to you the most?
What is "the one thing" you would like to change?
By changing that one thing that needs to be made better or right, you can bring your life back into balance so it no longer feels like you're in a rut.
This can include your own behavior.
Maybe you secretly want to finally start exercising, or eating healthy, but something is holding you back.
Again, this depends on the beliefs you have. When you find it hard to break the rut and do what it takes to fix your life something is holding you back.
This could be anything, such as your self-confidence or your idea of how the world works.
Something keeps you in a rut.
If you've had this feeling more often than not that it's better to keep going the way you're going, when you don't really want to, you can do something about it quite easily, namely with regression.
Regression is a hypnosis technique that helps you go back to the moment when you decided that drudgery is good, even if you actually want to break it.
Maybe you once got a weird belief that grown people should be in a rut and suddenly you find yourself growing up and needing to get into that rut and especially not doing that one thing that would make your life better.
With hypnosis therapy in which regression is used, you will find out where this moment came from and you can change your interpretation of this moment.
Often these are moments from your childhood because it is in those moments that you set the "rules of life." Most beliefs that people have originate in childhood, only you have the knowledge of a child so those beliefs don't have to be true.
When you undergo regression, the hypnotist helps you remember such a persuasive moment. Then the hypnotist helps you look at the moment from a different angle, to explain what people have done or said once with your adult knowledge.
This can quickly change the beliefs that keep you in your rut. Allowing you to quickly do that one thing that makes your new rut a fun rut because it no longer feels like a rut.
Hypnotic questions to break the rut
If you can't really put your finger on how you want to break your rut, you can also go into hypnosis to ask your subconscious the question. A hypnotherapist can help you with this, but you can also hypnotize yourself.
Next, ask yourself the following questions:
- What should I start working on now?
- Which problem creates the most pressure?
- What problem would change everything for the better if solved?
Because you are in hypnosis, a thought or image will immediately come to mind. This is then probably the best answer to the question. Then you will know what you need to work on to break your rut.
Visualize your perfect life
Another way to break the rut is to visualize your perfect life. This is helpful because of the thought, that thoughts become things. So the more you think about your perfect life. The more you will do things that will cause you to have that perfect life where you don't suffer from the rut.
When you are in the process of visualizing your perfect life, you can think about the more practical things first. What do you keep yourself busy with? What kind of house do you live in? What people do you have around you?
Visualizing this perfect life also creates certain feelings and emotions, probably good feelings and emotions.
Then when you give yourself affirmations about this perfect life you can repeat it daily to give yourself this good feeling, to motivate yourself to pursue this perfect life and thus break the rut.
So the first step is to hypnotize yourself, or have yourself hypnotized, and then visualize your perfect life. To do this, sit or lie down in a calm place, relax, take a few deep breaths, close your eyes and hypnotize yourself.
Then visualize, where you live, what work you do, what you do in your free time, the people you hang out with, how you feel, how you look.
Next, devise your affirmations, such as:
"I am successful, wealthy and happy. I have people around me who love me, and great friendships. I do good work and am committed to doing good things in the world. I use the power of hypnosis to accomplish all of this. I feel great with the knowledge that this is a simple and natural process. Every day my life gets better in every way."
If you find it difficult to figure this out for yourself, a hypnotist can help you with this and give you affirmations that fit your situation and your desires in your life.
Want to learn more about how hypnosis works and how you can help yourself and others? Then come to a hypnosis playshop. These are given in Wormerveer and Zwolle. During the playshop you will learn in 1 day how to hypnotize people and how it feels to be under hypnosis, which is also useful for self-hypnosis.
Want to get started right away with techniques to help people move forward? Then come to a seminar or enroll in one of Hypnosis Institute Netherlands' training courses.
