Resigning is not something you do lightly, but if you go to work crying every day, it may be time to change something in your life so that you can still be happy.
Why do you want to quit your job
There are many reasons to resign. You can resign because you feel you no longer fit in with the company or, on the contrary, because you see other opportunities in your life, such as a better job.
More and more people are also quitting their jobs to begin entrepreneurship themselves , as many people believe they will get more appreciation, or enjoyment, from entrepreneurship than with a salaried career. Research shows this is true for people who start a small business and even people who go into salaried employment at a start-up. But are you an entrepreneur of a larger company? Then you won't necessarily have more job satisfaction than if you are salaried[1].
Many people who are dissatisfied with their mental health also want to quit their job if they can afford it[2]. So either when they have saved enough or when they have found another job. In particular, if you feel that your job is not really meaningful, you may have a greater intention to change jobs.
If you are nearing retirement, you may also want to quit your job for your health. In a job that demands a lot from you physically, for example, this may help improve your health. In a job that demands a lot of you mentally, this helps reduce depressive symptoms[3].
Having a supervisor who cannot communicate and is not good at leading can also be grounds for resignation. In fact, the bond you have with your supervisor can cause mental problems if it is not good. For example, you are then more likely to continue working when you are actually sick, which of course is not at all convenient[4].
Is resignation even necessary?
Maybe your work is hard or you don't feel like it's meaningful , but is it? If you work a lot, you may also have a problem with standing up for yourself, especially stating your boundaries. Have you ever tried that? Yes, and didn't it work? Then it is quite understandable that you want to resign.
But if the answer is "no," why haven't you mentioned that you want to work less or what your problem is?
It's helpful to explore that and to test whether or not you can say things to co-workers or your supervisor first, especially if you want to resign anyway. After all, what do you have to lose. For the same money, they actually respond positively to your problems and it gets resolved. Then you won't have to look for another job either.
With a toxic boss, it can also be helpful not to give feedback, but to simply ask for what you need. Sometimes you can also look within a company to see if you can go to another department[5].
If you find it difficult to test this, you can look at what beliefs you have that make it difficult for you to set boundaries or indicate what could be improved at work, for example.
For example, a hypnotherapist can help you figure out why you don't do certain things when you secretly know it would be more convenient to do them. Beliefs about work and how to deal with managers or bosses can make it difficult for you to create a good work environment. There are several techniques that can be used for this, such as cognitive behavioral therapy with a focus on hypnotherapy[6].
Steps for resigning
Have you stood up for yourself and no one is listening to you? Then it may still be convenient for yourself to quit your job, but of course it's not meant to be a poverty trap .
Therefore, it is first important to have an alternative. Finding a new job may be important or perhaps you already have your own business in addition to your job that provides income.
Now you may think you don't have enough energy to look for another job in addition to your current one.
But it is important to realize that continuing to work for someone who is not right for you is unhealthy. Swedish research shows that men who continue to work for a toxic boss are 60% more likely to have a heart attack, stroke, or other life-threatening cardiovascular problem (source 5).
Other research shows that continuing to work in an environment that is not good for you increases the risk of depression and worsens your immune system. If you then quit your job, it can take another 22 months to recover physically and emotionally from that bad boss (source 5).
To still have the energy to find another job and to keep going until you have an alternative, it is important to surround yourself with people who have your best interests at heart. Talk to friends and colleagues. Outside of work, do things that make you happy.
Also, continue to pay close attention to your health. Exercise, sleep and meditate. Mindfulness can be very helpful in keeping your mind in the here and now and not thinking about your annoying boss when you are with your friends, for example.
Practical Steps
If you resign, you often have to give at least a month's notice. Write a professional resignation letter so that if your (former) boss is ever called for a reference he/she does not have a reason to be dickish.
Make a plan for your job transition. For example, clearly outline what projects you are still going to complete and what you won't take off once you turn in your resignation letter. Stick to these plans.
Make sure you have everything ready in case you have a boss who wants you gone immediately when you hand in your resignation letter. That will save a lot of hassle.
If you find it difficult to stay professional and actually hand in the letter, a hypnotherapist can help you with visualizations about resigning to make this easier.
Applying for a new job
When applying for a new job, don't gossip about your previous/current boss. All the person will see then is someone complaining about their current boss and work while not knowing your current manager (source 5). That can give the wrong impression when you actually just want to get a good job.
Making yourself mentally strong for redundancy
If you've worked in an unhealthy environment for a long time, your self-confidence may be incredibly diminished. You may also have been stuck somewhere for a long time because you don't think you are good enough to be allowed to work somewhere else.
Hypnotherapy, fortunately, can very well help you improve your self-confidence[7]. If you are currently afraid to quit your job or look for another job, a hypnotherapist can help you identify why you feel that way. That belief can then be replaced with a belief that you do deserve to have a job that makes you happy and gives your life meaning.
With regression, for example, you can find out what is blocking you , and then go back to the moment in your life that created that block. With the help of the hypnotherapist, you can reinterpret that moment and this alone can make you feel more confident in your abilities and chances of getting another job.
Your self-image may also change as a result[8]. For example, you may see yourself as a victim of your current job, but after hypnosis, you can see yourself as a survivor and someone who actually seeks solutions to be in charge of his/her own life.
In addition, you can receive hypnotic suggestions to help you improve your self-confidence. These may include suggestions such as:
"If I wasn't good at my job I would have been fired a long time ago."
"I can figure anything out."
"I deserve a job that suits me."
"I have connections that help me."
These are just examples. Depending on your problems with quitting your job, a hypnotherapist can give you other suggestions that will help you find a new job so you can quit your current one.
Resigning is sometimes the last difficult step you take when you are in a job that makes you dead unhappy. Before you quit, though, it is helpful if you have an alternative, such as a somewhat running your own business or another job.
If you want to quit your job, chances are that you are now unhappy with your job, and that can have a lot of impact on your physical and mental health. It is therefore important to take care of your health outside of work. Hypnotherapy can help you with your mental health to gain the confidence to find a new job.
Want to learn more about how hypnosis can help? Then come to the free online master class.
Or register for a seminar or training from the Hypnosis Institute Netherlands.
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