Being confused: How do you notice it and what can you do?

Being confused is not necessarily something that is bad. In fact, being confused can be very good for you because you can learn from your confusion[1]. Confusion is often the result of seeing that how you think the world works is not how the world works. You then have difficulty reconciling reality with your thoughts about reality.

Confusion is a signal that your thoughts have suddenly been interrupted by something else. Your thought process needs to stop and start over[2].

You then have two options: either refuse to learn from the situation and cling to your thoughts, or face reality, learn from it, and adjust your perceptions of reality.

For example, what can be confusing is our Dutch school system. You do the vwo, then you go to university and then you should get a good job. It can then be very confusing when you find that your "higher" studies don't provide that better job. Or because you had student loans you can't buy that one house, while that construction worker (without student debt) can. Or even worse, you get turned down for a job because you belonged to a student union. Instead of the person sitting in front of you seeing this as an advantage, he or she sees it as a disadvantage.

This idea of privilege, which can be installed in you by our education system, can bring you confusion and anger later in life[3].

Being Consciously Confused

You can also deliberately seek confusion, which is also something some people do. For example, people whose traits include being open to new experiences and curious are more likely to be confused in a positive way[4].

They expose their mindsets to new situations more often, leaving them confused and needing to adjust their ideas.

As you become consciously confused more often, you also become more and more of an expert in the area you are often confused about, as you are confronted with new information every time. For example, we checked with art lovers to see if abstract art caused confusion. The more expertise a person had in the field of art, the less confused he became by the art[5].

Other research also shows that being confused has a positive correlation when seeking new knowledge[6]. Are you often confused about a particular topic? Then you are likely to become an expert on it.

Not being able to get out of confusion

Sometimes a certain reality or situation can feel so strange to you that you can’t wrap your mind around it. This can make you feel like you ’re stuck in a particular situation. For example, you might be confused about why your family treats you the way they do. You just can’t seem to reconcile your idea of how a family is supposed to function with the way your family actually functions. You just can’t accept that your family, for example, doesn’t function the way you think it should.

Then you can try something over and over and run into a wall of misunderstanding, because your family is probably just as confused about you as you are about them.

So confusion is important for gaining new insights and learning something, but if you can't gain that new insight you can get stuck in confusion. So how do you make sure you disentangle?

Sometimes, then, acceptance therapy can be a way out. For example, hypnotherapy can help you accept a situation as it is, so you don't keep hurting yourself with the feeling that you have to do something about the situation to change it. Sometimes there is nothing you can do about it, and accepting it is important in order to move on with your life.

Looking at the situation in a different way

Often there is something blocking you from accepting something that can keep you confused. Something is blocking you from facing a certain fact. For example, a belief about how life is supposed to work is not confirmed by the situation, so you actually have to re-examine whether the belief is correct.

One way to help you look at the situation in a different way is with regression. In fact, with regression, you can retrieve the moment when the belief that is now causing you problems arose. Then a hypnotherapist can help you reinterpret this moment, so that you are no longer hindered by that belief.

Another way to disentangle is to perform just a progression. With a progression, you can correctly visualize some kind of goal in the future and then also see the steps needed to make that image a truth.

The hypnotherapist's role is to discover rigid thoughts about your problem and then get you to look at your problem with a little more hope[7].

In addition, certain hypnotic suggestions can also reduce confusion . This can be important, for example, in cases of confusion that may arise during or in connection with medical procedures[8].

Confusion and putting someone into hypnosis

Confusion can be used in multiple ways by a hypnotherapist. For example, confusion can be used to induce hypnosis[9] and it can be used as a technique during treatment.

For example, researchers indicate that dentists can use confusion to induce hypnosis in anxious young patients. Other researchers suggest that using confusion during induction can be particularly important for people who are difficult to hypnotize and who keep analyzing what is happening instead of focusing on what is being asked of them. The idea is that the therapist acts in such a confusing manner that the person longs to be asked to do something logical, which will then trigger compliance[10].

Using confusion as a hypnosis technique

During hypnosis itself, making someone a little confused can even be a technique for getting people to look at their problem with fresh eyes. It can help keep people focused on therapy[11].

The hypnotic suggestions used in the confusion technique often have the following characteristics of language:

1. Using words with opposite meanings.
2. Using words that are the same but may have different meanings, such as couch.
3. Using synonyms.
4. Elaborate on the topic.
5. Interruptions.
6. Echo (parrots).
7. Using unfamiliar words or words that are rarely used[12].

Being confused can be a great learning opportunity as long as you can accept the confusing situation and know how to find a way out of it. Hypnotherapy can help you resolve being confused, as long as you are not suffering from psychosis (but that is often quite different from being confused anyway).

In addition, confusion can also be used to get you into hypnosis if you find it difficult and can be used during therapy itself.

Would you like to learn more about hypnosis and how it can help people? Then join us for the free online masterclass.

Or sign up for a seminar or one of our training programs. It’s great for your own personal growth and if you want to help others.

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