Confidant: how hypnosis can help with this task

Where people work, mistakes are made, and sometimes these mistakes are of a personal nature. Someone who is just a little too friendly toward a colleague may be accused of sexual harassment; someone who is just a little too direct with their opinion about someone else may be accused of bullying.

A safe work environment is important for a company's productivity , but what do you do when that safety isn't there for you? So then you can go to a confidant in the company.

What does a confidant do?

A confidant is someone who takes care of an employee who has been harassed at work, by co-workers or clients, in the first place. The confidant can then provide those people with help and advice on how to deal with these problems in the future.

If the problem is more complicated, the trustee can see if there is a solution informally. Otherwise, referrals can be made to a mediator or to the grievance procedure within a company.

In addition, the confidential counselor assists management by providing advice on how to prevent misconduct in the workplace and clarifies what does and does not constitute inappropriate behavior .

The trustee also records cases of inappropriate behavior[1].

Is a trustee required

A confidant is not mandatory, but companies are required to provide staff with a safe working environment. Having a confidant can help if people find it stressful to discuss problems with their supervisors or if the supervisor in question is the problem for that person.

Although a trustee is not mandatory, it is mandatory that people have access to a trustee. People can go there with complaints; both physical - and psychological - and interpersonal complaints. This can reduce absenteeism. Especially since 64% of absenteeism is due to psychological complaints.

External confidant

A confidant does not have to work in the company to be available. Therefore, smaller companies can also appoint an outside confidant.

With an in-house trustee, this is often someone who takes on the role of trustee in addition to other duties he or she has in the company.

What does a confidant need to meet?

According to the Chamber of Commerce, a trustee must meet the following:

"The trustee has knowledge of:

1. Relevant (social) legislation.
2. Individual - and group processes at play in cases of undesirable behavior or integrity violations.
3. The organizational structure and culture.

In addition, the trustee has the following qualities:

1. Has life experience.
2. Can empathize with others.
3. Is aware of sensitivities within an organization.
4. Has a balanced personality.
5. Can reflect on their own behavior and that of others.
6. Can handle confidential information.
7. Can deal with resistance.
8. Is able to act independently.
9. Understands how organizations work.
10. Has feelers for internal (power) relationships.
11. Is accessible and reachable.
12. Is willing to meet regularly with fellow confidants.
13. Can provide excellent oral and written communication.
14. Is a fine conversationalist.
15. Can advise well."[2]

How can hypnosis help?

As you can see, part of the job is to deal with grievances, especially concerning the workload people experience and personal relationships that become just a little too mean or intimate.

Now it is true that what comes across as bullying to one person may be teasing to another. What is sexual harassment to one person is a friendly touch to another.

How you feel about a certain behavior often depends on your beliefs. Sometimes, because of those beliefs, people think they can go further than is normal, and sometimes people are very strict in their beliefs about when someone has gone too far.

With hypnosis, you’ll learn how to make people more compliant, which is useful when a behavioral change is needed in the workplace. One advantage you already have is that people often need their jobs; this gives you a starting point for encouraging compliance. This can be used, among other things, in one-on-one support and coaching for people who are experiencing difficulties.

You can also use hypnosis techniques to help someone reflect on their own and others' behavior. Is someone perhaps stepping on their toes a little too quickly after all? Or has someone been a little too jovial after all? By helping people reflect, you also learn where some boundaries lie, and that can improve workplace behavior and how people feel about it.

In addition, knowing these techniques can also be useful when educating groups. For example, metaphors and telling stimulating stories is something you learn on a hypnosis training course.

Helping someone with their triggers

Sometimes it doesn't quite make sense that someone thinks something is going too far, and there may be more to it than that. In that case, you can also coach that person with hypnosis techniques[3].

If people who ask for your help and advice are open to it, you can, for example, perform regression. With this technique, you can guide the person back to the first moment they felt the emotion they’re now experiencing because of someone at work. This could be an event dating back to that person’s early childhood—say, starting at age three. The person can then identify an event in their life that evokes the same emotion—the one that’s bringing them to you now. Next, you can work with that person to change or “repair” that event[4]. This can change the feeling associated with behavior that normally triggers a negative emotion, allowing him or her to view it more neutrally or to change his or her behavior so that it is no longer so “bad.”

For example, you can teach him/her that the situation is different now and that he/she can stand up for him/herself, which he/she is already doing by coming to you.

This can already provide a great sense of relief. In the process, he/she can also begin to interpret the other person's behavior very differently, so that he/she is no longer so agitated by the behavior.

Changing unwanted behaviors or reactions to desired behaviors

By discussing the complaints, you can use techniques of hypnotherapy to find out why someone feels they are being bullied or why they are not bullying, when in fact they are.

For example, you can examine certain behavioral patterns— such as standing up for yourself just a little too much or talking someone down when they feel threatened—and determine what constitutes appropriate behavior in specific situations. How can you handle moments when you feel less confident in a respectful way, without having to put the other person down?

There are techniques for this as well.

If necessary, you can help people reframe their complaints , thereby resolving the problem internally within that person.

Changing coping with stress

Stress at work is one of the biggest complaints people have in the workplace. Sometimes the step of standing up for yourself through the confidant is more easily taken by people than going to their supervisor and indicating that they really have made their to-do list a little too long after all.

For example, if you notice that someone has gone to you, the confidant, first before raising something with the manager, someone may need a little help with developing self-confidence and assertiveness to start the conversation with the manager. Especially if you know that the manager in question is open to reallocating work if it becomes too much for someone.

Then working on self-confidence and assertiveness can already do much to ultimately reduce stress.

For example, you can then help people by repeating certain hypnotic suggestions , such as:

"I'm good enough."

"It is more important for me to do something less for a long period of time than to do a lot now and be sick more often as a result."

"I can tell what my limits are."

"I may ask for more work and I may ask for less work."

These are just examples. Depending on the person you are helping with advice and his/her problems with work, you may think of other suggestions.

In addition, you can also help people with self-hypnosis techniques for extra relaxation during breaks to reduce stress that way. These can even be exercises you give people during group education on desirable behavior at work. In fact, you can also educate people on ways they can reduce stress.

For example, you can teach people how to relax and briefly visualize a place where they can completely unwind.

So how all this works and how to use it can be learned during a hypnotherapy training course. Want to learn more about how hypnosis works? Then come to a free online master class.

Or register for one of our seminars or trainings .

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